Stephi's on Tremont, Boston

It was something of a hash frenzy, my Boston Summer breakfast spree. Duck hash at Mistral. Potato hash at Henrietta's. And last but not least, meatloaf hash at Stephi's on Tremont. I am, as you may have guessed, a sucker for anything hashed and brown. Especially when the brown component happens to be meatloaf, one of America's great contributions to world cuisine. The verdict? Stephi gives good hash...



Which is not surprising, when you consider that the "Queen of Patio Dining" just happens to be married to the "King of Ambulance Chasing", James Sokolove. With Jim making a motza from slip-and-trip lawsuits, Stephi clearly doesn't need the money. So the restaurant must just be for fun. A community service. Because Massachusetts deserves good meatloaf.

Mistral, Boston

Talk about slack. So many months, so little blogging. And so many breakfasts to catch up on. So here goes nothing. A highlight to kick things off, courtesy of Mistral. A rather fancy place in Boston's South End, serving a rather delicious confit duck and root vegetable hash topped with fried egg...

Toro, Boston

There are places in Boston that are popular for reasons I do not understand. And then there are places like Toro, 1704 Washington Street, Boston, MA, Tel +1 (617) 536-4300. Toro is popular because it is good. The food is good. The venue is good. The service is good. The coffee is not horrible. You can even get an Aperol Spritz.

Columbus Cafe and Bar, Boston

Maybe they do a great brunch at Columbus Cafe and Bar, 535 Columbus Avenue, Boston (South End), Tel +1 (617) 247-9001. And maybe Joaquin Pheonix will make a great rapper. Or maybe not. At the end of the day, these are matters of opinion.



If you believe the opinions on Yelp, this place deserves 4 out of 5 stars and is good for brunch. One Yelper even rates the Maine Eggs Benedict her favorite brunch dish ever. As Flavor Fav would say, don't believe the hype. This just proves that too much opinion can be just as bad as too little. Because there is no way I would rate the eggs benny as anything other than a bare pass. The poached eggs were good, and the crab cakes weren't bad, but it was all downhill from there. The hollandaise was like cold whipped butter, completely devoid of tang. The muffins were absolutely rock hard and stale. The home fries were too greasy. And I really don't see the point of the cold slide of tomato.

I have no doubt that loyal locals will be spitting out their Vermont Scrambles or choking on their chorizo as they read this. So let me just say that I get that it's cozy, I liked the coffee, and the staff seemed very nice. My gripe is the food. Like Joaquin's rapping, it needs much work. In my humble opinion, of course.

13/20 "over hyped"

Petit Robert Bistro, Boston

It sounded intriguing. A scrambled quiche omelette. It wasn't. It was an omelette with random bits of quiche thrown in, served on a plate so hot I felt the need to request a pair of asbestos gloves. Not impressed with Petit Robert Bistro, 480 Columbus Avenue, Boston (South End) MA, Tel +1 (617) 867 0600.



This really was a sorry excuse for a breakfast. Shove the skanky leftovers of quiche into an overcooked omelette. Garnish with dried parsley sprinkles. Plate up two shriveled halves of potato. Scoop a fistful of limp carrot strips and green beans onto the plate. Et voila! Brunch.

Avoid this place like the plague.

9/20 "scrambled merde"

South End Buttery, Boston

You can put a cat in the oven, but that don't make it a biscuit.

Wesley Snipes, White Men Can't Jump

Wesley Snipes isn't the only person confused about what makes a biscuit. Most of America (Mr Snipes included) will describe a biscuit as soft and cake-like, not hard and crunchy. The UK tax man tried to argue that Jaffa Cakes (soft, baked treats popular in Britain) are biscuits, which is amusing, since Wesley and the tax man don't usually see eye-to-eye. And despite only selling "cookies" and "crackers", America's Nabisco was originally known as the National Biscuit Company. I guess Nacracko sounded a little too close to crack 'ho.



So, what kind of biscuit did I have for breakfast this morning? A Buttery Country Biscuit from the South End Buttery, 314 Shawmutt Avenue, Boston, Tel +1 (617) 482-1015. Soft on the inside, crunchy on the outside, and crumbly all over.

It tasted pretty good, but I have to wonder about the wisdom of serving a biscuit as a sandwich. Not only do biscuits disintegrate under pressure, but this one was such a towering stack of biscuit, baked egg, bacon and biscuit, that you'd need a Cameron Diaz sized mouth to have any hope of getting your jaws around it. It was also missing the aged cheddar, and very dry, with no condiments or juices to balance things out. I now understand why Southerners and soldiers usually take their biscuits with gravy.

Other options include bagels, "breakfast breads" (banana-date nut loaf, for example), pastries, and cupcakes. I think next time I'll try "Eggs in the Hole" or a "Peanut Buttery" (nutella and homemade peanut butter on toasted croissant). With most breakfast dishes priced under $6, the South End Buttery offers pretty good value.

Metropolis, Boston

I don't think the BBH and eggs is the best dish to order at Metropolis...

Pops, Boston

Jaunts? Jaunts? You must be kidding. I'm over here in America dodging snow-scrapers and monster trucks, eating trans-fat for breakfast and people accuse me of having a jaunt? Then start moaning about the declining quality of Breakfast Blog content? Ex-squeeze me for a second while I purchase an automatic weapon and go postal. About the nearest thing I've had to a jaunt in the past 6 weeks was this brunch in the South End, at Pops, 560 Tremont Street, Boston, MA, Tel +1 (617) 695-1250.



For those stupid enough not to figure it out, I am working my fanny* off over here, and there may, accordingly, be some temporary interruptions to the usual schedule of Breakfast Blog transmissions. Sue me.

If you happen to get lucky with your own Boston boondoggle, one place you should not miss is Pops, where the salmon with soft scrambles is exceptionally good: delicate eggs, fresh salmon, crunchy shards of potato galette, and a delicious drizzle of Dijonaise caper sauce.

Another great dish is the "Deconstructed Red Flannel Hash and Eggs", which turned out to be a pile of finely-diced home-fries alongside a pile of finely-diced (and fried) corned beef, topped with a couple of perfectly-poached eggs. And just to be a pig, I had a side of griddled banana bread.

I won't attempt to cover the whole menu, but I will point out a few other highlights: omelettes with goat cheese and sage, or mushroom and truffle oil; French toast Monte Cristo, with ham, turkey, swiss cheese and strawberry jam; and chicken fried steak, served with eggs, gravy and roast potatoes.

Service is very good, venue is slick, and best of all, everything is quite affordable, at between $10 and $12 (the chicken fried steak is $15).

17/20 "popstar"


*Note to Australian readers, "fanny" means "bum" in America.

Tremont 647, Boston

During her ankle-bracelet days, Martha Stewart probably became quite attached to her pajamas. So it's no surprise that she's started wearing jim jams to work. But what about the rest of us? Won't we get arrested if we start roaming the streets in our sleepwear? Not if we live near the South End. It's pajama brunch every weekend at Tremont 647, 647 Tremont Street, Boston, MA, where staff and diners are free to flaunt their finest flannelette. Just try to keep the tiger in his cage...