Great American Bagel, Chicago O'Hare

If I change my first name from "Jamie" to "Professor" it doesn't really make me a professor. And calling a bagel joint The Great American Bagel doesn't mean the bagels are great. They are fine. But they are not great.

Golder Pear Cafe, Southampton

Nothing says you are home in the Hamptons more than standing in line at the Golden Pear

Alec Baldwin, F.A.G., budding politician, parenting role model

Red Flame Diner, New York

There are certain things New York is famous for, and one of them is the lox-cream-cheese-bagel. And there are certain bagels that are more famous than others, and one of them is H&H. What really matters with bagels, however, is not so much fame as freshness, and I was very satisfied with the freshness of these H&H bagels at the Red Flame Diner. I wonder if Kramer made them?